Nothing can be more painful than a breakup. The pain is lingering and unbearable.
You may experience feelings of loneliness, hopelessness, sadness, rejection, anger, and confusion. The loss of appetite and energy are also common.
Some people overcome the trauma in a few weeks, while others take years to cope with the heartbreak. A relatively new form of therapy is Couples On The Brink Counseling, which helps couples gain clarity and confidence on whether they should stay together or divorce. It is a short-term therapy and if the couple decides they want to work on the relationships, they can enter into in-office Gottman Marriage Therapy or another new approach: Online Gottman Marriage Therapy.
If you and your partner decide to end the relationship, you can do so with grace and dignity. How so?
The first thing to remember not to lose heart. Things will become better with time. Be disciplined in keeping your mind positive and optimistic.
The following tips might help you recover from post-breakup pain and trauma.
Don’t Try To Contact Your Ex
Unless you have children together, stay away from your ex and never try to contact him or her through phone, social media, email, or text message.
You need the space to heal the wounds and move forward in life. Delete your ex’s number and social media ties. If your ex-partner tries to contact you, don’t get caught in the moment. Remind yourself of all the reasons the relationship would not be one of stability and happiness.
If you are in a co-parenting situation, you should find ways to create space and boundaries, especially when emotions are still raw.
Reconstruct Your Self-Esteem
After a divorce or separation, most people begin to self-question their personality traits and physical appearance. Such negative self-talk can erode your self-confidence. A trained professional can help you retrain your thought patterns and, thus, control your anxiety and alleviate the pain of the breakup.
Get Support From Friends & Family
Surround yourself with positive and supportive people. They love you and can provide you emotional support, help distract you from your pain as you heal, and keep you company when you do not want to be alone.
Prioritize Self Care
Give sufficient time to yourself and prioritize your mental as well as physical well-being. Do not self-medicate with alcohol and drugs as a way to deal with the pain. Being addicted to these harmful substances will only worsen – and even destroy – the outlook for your future. Stay fit with regular sleep routines, daily exercise, healthy eating, and meditation.
Do Something New
Explore new places either by yourself or with close friends. A new adventure, such as river rafting, or a new hobby, such as photography, will refresh your mind. Get reacquainted with yourself as an individual.
The Bottom Line:
If you need help to recover from and cope with the pain, seek a counselor who is trained on relationships, trauma, or depression. A Gottman therapist can guide you through a treatment plan to help you move forward.
Sunny Skousen is an experienced writer who has over 20 years of experience in ghostwriting, blogging, journalism, speech writing, and content marketing. She specializes in writing about Couples Therapy, Family Therapy, Faith-Based Counseling, Anxiety Disorders, Mood Disorders, Grief/Loss and Trauma, Supervision and Consultation, and more!